MSJ

I spent the summer getting ready for the transfer. When I got to came I wasn't nervous at all. I knew my talents, and I knew they wanted me here for a reason. After the first day of practice I had already moved up the depth chart. So I was excited to see if I would be playing a lot on defense. The first couple of weeks of the season I played special teams. I thought to myself, I didn't want to spend my whole college football career playing special teams. But, luckily, my opportunity came. I moved up to the number one spot on the depth chart at strong safety. I started the rest of the season. I played well, I wanted to make more plays than I did, but that's the competitive nature in me. As a team the season didn't go as well as I had thought it would have. We ended the season at 5-5. It was a heartbreaker of a season, and if a few things that were done different we could have a better record.

Bad Season Continued

After the bad loss we had meetings the next week, like we always did, and I was now third string free safety. I was infuriated and that's when I figured out that it was going to be a long season for me. I went back to playing special teams. At one point, after the third game and third loss, I had the urge to quit because I thought that I didn't recieve a fair opportunity. I just stuck it out for the season. The season went horrible. After going 8-3 and winning a conference championship; we went 4-7. After the season, and after I saw that I couldn't get another chance to prove myself, I asked for my transfer papers. I called my head coach from high and asked him if he could help me find a new school. Within a couple of weeks I had about four schools to choose from. During winter break I visited Mount Saint Joseph's, and that was it for me. I had knew where I wanted to transfer to. I liked the program, facilities, location, and environment.

Season

I couldn't have asked for a better environment for my first game playing defense. Playing in front of 15,000 people on the road against the #1 team in Division II football. I thought I was ready. I wasn't really nervous before the game; I was more focused than anything. Then the game started and my head was spinning. It was like I had forgot everything I practiced and got from watching film. I calmed down after I made my first tackle. Unfortunately I took a bad angle and the running back broke a long run before I made that first tackle. I came out instantly. I was put back in later in the game and I ended up not having a bad game after that first mishap. We ended up getting beat pretty bad which started a bad season all together.

Summer/Summer Camp

During the summer I stayed at the school like I had done the previous year. I worked at a fireworks store and I lifted when I could. I wasn't worried about losing my spot because I knew the position and I felt that I was able to play the upcoming season. Camp came and I was still number one on the depth chart. I had a pretty good camp. I was making plays, and really proving that I deserved to play. As camp winded down we had to prepare for the #1 team in the nation. So my first game was gonna be a big test, but I thought I was ready for it. The week leading up to the game I was preparing myself for the opponent, and I felt that I was ready.

After the Season/Spring ball

After the season we celebrated the win. Unfortunately we didn't make the playoffs. We took a couple months off and then started winter workouts after winter break. I worked hard in the off season because I wanted to play defense that next season. I made it through our winter conditioning fine. The time for spring football practice had come. The coaches told me that I would have to know the cornerback and free safety positions. I was happy about that because I knew that the free safety positon was open. During practice I was put in at free safety and never looked back. I had made it to the top of the depth chart. The spring ball game came around and I was excited to be starting defense. The game going ok, I missed a couple of opportunities to make some tackles but I felt I was having a pretty game nonetheless. Going into the last minute of the game the defense was down by 5 points. So the defense needed to come up with a turnover and score. The next play the offense ran a run play, the cornerback came up and stripped the ball from the running back. He started to get tackled so he, blindly, tossed the ball behind him. I was luckily there to catch it and run it in for a touchdown to end the game. A great ending to our spring ball game.

Conference Championship

Going into our last game our record was 7-3. The team we were playing was 10-0. They were in our conference and the game was for the conference championship. The weather was horrible. It was cold, snowy, windy, and it rained a little bit. The other team had a really good quarterback who could run and pass. They also had this other quarterback that they brought in that could really throw the ball. The wasn't really much of a game the first half. They just flat out whooped our butt the first half. We went into halftime down 20-10. The second half we started slow and really couldn't get anything rolling offensively. At the end of the third quarter it was 23-10. Then we finally started to pick it up scoring 14 unanswered points to take the lead 24-23. A interception gave us an opportunity to take the lead. After taking the lead I made the tackle on kickoff. They tried to drive the field with under a minute left. They drive down to our 36 yard line and the same cornerback, who intercepted the first ball, got another interception with :19 seconds to go. The game was over and we had won the Conference.

Season Continued

After that first win, the season continued to roll along. I continued to play special teams playing kickoff and kickoff return. It felt good that I was playing as a freshman, but my competitive spirit wanted to be out there playing the whole game. However, I understood that I wasn't ready to play on defense yet; so I was content playing special teams. There were some games where I would get in on defense if we were winning big. There was also a game where a teammate that played my position got hurt in the third quarter and I came in and played the rest of the game. Talk about nervous; but didn't do too bad. As the year went along we won a lot of games and lost a few. My freshman season I was living the dream. I was playing college football, traveling to different states, playing great teams from all over...I couldn't have dreamed a better situation.

Start of the Season

Week one had arrived and I was nervous the whole week. I found out that I would be playing mostly special teams (punt, and punt return teams). As the week ended I started to get more and more excited. Saturday finally came and I wasn't nervous anymore. I was ready to hit the field when I woke up. The team did the normal routine when we played at home. We meet for breakfast, walked to the grotto for a prayer, then walked to the locker room to get ready. Before the game I really didn't talk to anyone because I was focused on not messing up when I got on the field. We went out for pre-game warm-up and that's when I really started to get amped up for the game. The time had finally come; the game started. We stopped their offense on 3rd down, and it was time for me to go out on the field. My job on punt return was to stop the receiver/flanker from getting to the returner. I did alright on the first punt return, but the second I did horrible. I let my man run by me and put a huge hit on my teammate who was returning. I got pulled from punt return. I was angry, but at myself because I knew I should have done better. I did get into the game, toward the end, playing cornerback. We won the game.

Camp

The summer was coming to an end and it was alomst time for camp to start. My mentality coming into to camp was "I'm a freshman behind two upper-classman that are good, just try to get on the field somewhere." So I worked as hard as I could to prove to the coaches that I deserved to be on the field. For the first week of camp it's kind of like an introduction week. The freshman show up and have no idea what is going on, or what is going to happen. For me being there a semester eearly help me be "one-up" on the freshman that had just came into camp. Luckily camp wasn't bad as far as the weather. The weather was actually pretty bearable throughout camp. I think there was only like three days where it was 80 degrees or higher out of two weeks of camp. I was grateful that because the coaches pushed us to our limits so it helped that weather and mother nature was on our side. As camp went on and people were battling for positions on the field. I knew that I wasn't going to start, or anything, at cornerback but I tried to be the best corner I could so if an injury hhappened I would be prepared to fill in. As the days turned into weeks the first game was right around the corner, and I started to realize that my dream of playing college football was drawing closer to coming true.

Summer

Spring football was over and the school year and the school year ended. I went home for a month then went back to school to work and workout with team. (Well the people who stayed at school for the summer.) I stayed on campus so all I paid for was groceries. We worked out every Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday. Then we had 7 on 7 on Wednesdays. The workouts were tough because we would run first outside then lift. Some days it would be extremely hot during workouts but it was something you got used to. I worked outside doing grounds crew stuff like fixing up gardens, raking leaves, laying bricks around a walking path, etc. Me being outside all day really made me not want to go to lifting sometimes. At first I didn't want to go back to campus and stay for the summer, but in the long run I'm glad I did because I got better as a player and I bonded with my teammates.

Spring Ball Game

The day of the game I was excited. We went through, what would be, a normal routine of eating breakfast, walking to the grotto, then going to the locker room to get ready. The whole pregame routine i had some butterflies, but I was more anxious than anything. While I was getting ready in the locker room I was mentally going through my assignments and telling myself "Not to mess up." We went out to warm up and went through that routine. It was time for the game to start. The first two plays nothing much happened. Then on 3rd down I knew what was comming. All week in practice I had trouble covering the "GO" route. So on 3rd down I knew that was the route that I was going to have to guard on the play. The play started and I saw it in the receiver's eyes that he wanted to beat me deep. I turn and run with him, getting my body into him. Incomplete pass; I had finally figured out how to cover that route. At that point I had confidence and felt invincible. The rest of the game ended with the defense winning 17-13 and with me being satisfied with how I played.

Spring Ball

After CHAMPS we transitioned to the next faze of the offseason and that was spring football practices and game. We practiced three times a week and th egame was at the end. These practices were like normal, regular season practices. We were helmets, shoulder pads on certain days, and also went full pads some days. I was excited but nervous because I hadn't put on a pair of football cleats since my senior season in '04. I thought I was going to be rusty, and wasn't going to be able to perform well enough. I did alright though; there were some things that I didn't pick up on right away, but I eventually got it. It was kind of like I was thrown into the fire and had to learn on the run. I went in to spring ball wanting to learn. I wasn't worried taking someone spot because I had two All-American corners playing in front of me. I just wanted to learn the defensive scheme and actually learn the game of football. Practice went well for the four weeks we practiced. The last day of the fourth week we had a spring ball game which was a glorified scrimmage between the offense and the defense. Lucky for me the two corner ahead of me on the depth chart had to do something for class the day of the spring ball game so I got to start and play the whole game. The game was fun and exciting. I was happy with my performance not making too many mistakes. I would have liked to have played better but it was ok because the coaches were pleased with my performance.

Whole Other World

When I got to campus I was happy for a number of reasons. I was happy to finally be away from home and out on my own, I about to fulfill my dream of playing college football, and I was happy to be in new surroundings (new people, new school, etc.). The first week of school the football team had a meeting to explain what the next few weeks were going to be like. I was extremely excited. I couldn't believe that I was in my first college football meeting. The following week we started winter conditioning and lifting. I was nervous because I didn't know how in shape I was going to be in. I didn't know how much I could lift anymore. I didn't know how well my lifting apparatus was going to hold up since it was made out of moldable plastic. The first I surprised myself because I was able to keep up with everyone else, and I wasn't as weak as I thought I might have been. The only thing I was dissappointed about was that I couldn't do every lift because my apparatus could hold more than 5-10 lbs. I was just able to do pushing exercises. As the weeks went on it drew closer to this thing called CHAMPS. CHAMPS was early morning conditioning at 4:45 A.M. It was a lot of drills and footwork, then we would run 200 meter sprints afterward. Since I didn'y know what they were I didnt know about how bad they were going to suck. They were horrible, especially since I still considered myself out of shape. I got through them though, and a lot better than other players there.

Big Decision!!!

As the days went on my trips to the physical therapist started to decrease, and I had to make a major decision that would affect the rest of my life. I had to decide if I wanted to continue my dream of playing college football or give my dream up and go to a local college without a football program. I made the decision to follow my dream. I did not want to have regrets about not playing. When I left I wanted to make sure I was equipped with everything I needed to perform well on and off the field. My physical therapist made me a contraption that helped me lift weights. My prosthetic doctor teamed up with another arm specialist to make me a pad for my arm so I would not get hurt during practice.

Physical Therapy

All my physical therapy sessions were going well. My scares were all healing nicely. My physical therapist referred me to a doctor who specializes in prosthetics. I went and talked to him about possibly getting a prosthetic hand. He told me I had to wait for all the swelling to go down on my arm before I could get a prosthetic. He also explained to me what type of attachment I would get. This attachment looked like a hand, and base off the flexion of my forearm muscles the hand would open and close.

Transition Back Home

I flew back back home the following Sunday, and that was an interesting experience. Since I was still bandaged up and hadn't healed from surgery I had to have this big foam box looking thing that protected my arm from anything that hit it. I was happy to finally be home. It was good to finally see all my friends and family back home. Now I had to find a docter close to my house. A week after I returned home I had to find another upper extremities doctor. I had to find one close to home because the other one I had was my surgeon in Florida. I also had to find a place to do physical therapy. My mom found a place where the doctor’s office and physical therapy were all in the same building. I went on my first visit and I didn’t know what to expect. Everything went fine with my first visit at the doctor’s and physical therapy.

Out of the Hospital/Birthday

It was a bitter-sweet day when I was released from the hospital. Like I said I was released on Thursday, July 28th, which happened to be my birthday. The sweet part of the day was I got out of the hospital, it was my birthday, and my brother bought an ice cream cake for my birthday (if you can't tell, it's my favorite). (WARNING! THE NEXT PART MAY NOT BE FOR THE WEAK AT HEART, BUT MAY BE VERY FUNNY TO SOME) The bitter part of the day was this wasn't how I wanted to spend my birthday, and what happened when I got back to my brother's apartment. For those that don't know, or never been in the hospital for an extended period of time, when you're in the hospital for a number of days and are not able to use the bathroom on your own they give you a catheter, allowing you to use the bathroom without getting up. To make a long story short, I had built up stool because the docter slowed down my digestive system. So I had to take a laxative to get all of that nastiness out of me. WORST PART OF THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE. As soon as I take it, no more than 15 minutes later I was ready to go to the bathroom. The worst part is that my brother's apartment only had one bathroom, but it was upstairs. But my mom help me make it ok, did my business and had my mom help me get back downstairs. Five minutes later I had to go again. This time I almost didn't make it. That would have been a bad situation. After that I was pretty regular.

The Hospital: part 2

Post-op I'm laying in bed just wondering what happens now. Where do I go from here? All those thoughts are wiped out by my family. They were so supportive and made sure that I would have everything to continue my dream of playing college football. I was in the hospital from Saturday the 23rd to Thursday the 28th. I didn't do too much in the hospital except lay in bed, and enjoy the nurses. Luckily I was still 17 so I was admitted to the children's hospital. The nurses in Florida, especially in the children's hospital, are beautiful. I don't think I had a bad looking nurse. But on a more serious subject, I felt bad for my mom, she stayed with me the whole time. She would sleep in a little hospital chair. She would go to my brother's apartment to clean up then come right back to the hospital. I don't even know what she ate, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't the greatest. While I was in the hospital I talked to the lawyer about suing the guy that hit us. I had to sign papers to get that process going (it is still ongoing). Towards Tuesday or Wednesday I got to walk around a little bit to get my legs back. Thursday they released me.

The Hospital

I remember waking up in the hospital and my brother, mom, and 2 of my uncles were standing around me. I was so relieved to see my mom. She and my uncles (her brothers) flew down when they found out that the accident happened. The first night, the doctor told me that they would go in and check and see if they could repair any damage that was done to my hands. If nothing could be repaired then they said that they would go back in the next day (Sunday) and try again, but if nothing could be repaired then they would have to take my right hand. So Sunday it was time for the second surgery, and the docter told me that it was almost certain that they would have to amputate my hand. I just started crying, and the first thing I thought about was what was going to happen to football. I had a scholarship to play at a Division II school in Indiana. So before surgery that's all I thought about.

The Day in the Life of an Amputeed Athlete: The Beginning

This is about my car accident and me getting through it.

July 22, 2005 is the day that changed my life forever. It was a beautiful Saturday morning in Florida, and my brother, his girlfriend, and I decided to go out to breakfast. We were driving along I-95, and then we get clipped in the back of Land Rover by a van. For those of you that know about vehicles, you know that Land Rovers are top-heavy. So obviously the car tipped over on the passenger side, the side that I and my brother's girlfriend was on. On impact, I try to brace myself and on impact the windows shatter and both hands end up outside the window. The vehicle skids for about a quarter mile. When the car stops, my brother climbs out of the car and calls 911, and tries to find away to help us get out. I am extremely scared at this point, but oddly enough I didn't panic. I was talking to my brother's girlfriend to keep her calm and surprisingly keep her alive. (I found out months later that if I hadn't talked to her, she could have been in serious trouble and could have possibly died.) I blacked-out so I don't remember a lot of things that happened. I vaguely remember getting into the ambulance. I just remember waking up in the hospital.